
Mentoring Using a Coaching Approach
Mentorship and coaching are different! Mentorship involves offering advice and guidance to help our mentees achieve their goals. On the other hand, coaching focuses on empowering our coachees to discover their own solutions and reach their aspirations.
But what if we could marry the two? In mentoring, we often switch rolesโcoach, mentor, teacher, manager, and more. It’s important to be clear about which role we’re playing at any given moment, and we must play it well!
Mentoring works best when it’s centered around a coaching approach.
In this blog, we share how you can wear the hat of a coach and what coaching techniques you can use with your mentee.
Jump to Each Section
- Setting up the Mentoring Relationship
- Before Coaching, Identify the Mentorship Support Needed
- Practical Tools and Frameworks for Coaching
- Johari Window – Framework 1
- TGROW Modelย – Framework 2
- Mentoring Funnel – Framework 3
- The Role of Advice in Mentoring
- To Sum up
Setting up the Mentoring Relationship
Before we start mentoring, we believe that the foundation of any successful mentoring relationship, much like coaching, is to have a clear contract. This doesnโt have to be long and extensive; a few bullet points in an email can suffice. Here are some key elements to consider:
- Goals – Define the purpose of the mentoring relationship.
- Expectations – Clarify what each party expects, including feedback, challenge, and conflict resolution strategies.
- Boundaries – Establish what topics are appropriate to discuss, especially in organisational settings where confidentiality is crucial.
- Logistics – Agree on the frequency, duration, and location of meetings.
- Ground Rules – Set guidelines on confidentiality, ownership of tasks, and commitment to meeting schedules.
We share more about how you can set up a mentorship relationship in another blog on โHow to Become a Mentor.” Do have a read if you’re serious about becoming a mentor!
Early trust-building is important.ย
Share a bit about yourself and your journey to create a connection. Trust is further reinforced by reliable communication, confidentiality, and the creation of a comfortable, private environment for discussions.
Before Coaching, Identify the Level of Mentoring Support Needed
Being clear about your menteeโs current position and their desired state is important. You have to start contracting well at the start of the conversation to know what goals theyโre setting for themselves. Without that, you will not know what support to give.
Using a framework that balances challenge and support can help mentees find that success. Some mentees may need more challenge, while others may require more support. Regularly check in with your mentee to gauge their needs and adjust your approach accordingly.
The goal is to help them move towards high performance, where both support and challenge are balanced. You can learn more about this technique in our blog on Executive coaching.
Practical Tools and Frameworks
Here are some frameworks you can use to challenge and support your mentee.
Johari Window: Framework 1
This model helps mentees become aware of their public, private, blind spots, and unconscious areas. Mentors can provide feedback to help mentees see beyond their blind spots and grow. Hereโs how you can use it:
-
- Public Area – ย Encourage mentees to share known strengths and areas theyโre comfortable with. Discuss how these can be leveraged.
- Private Area – Invite mentees to disclose areas they are aware of but haven’t shared. Ensure a safe environment for these discussions.
- Blind Spots – Offer constructive feedback to reveal areas the mentee may not be aware of. This can be crucial for personal and professional growth.
- Unknown Area – ย Be mindful that there are aspects both you and the mentee are unaware of. This area might surface gradually through deep reflection and discussion.
TGROW Model: Framework 2ย
This coaching framework can be adapted for mentoring. It involves setting a topic and goal, exploring the reality of the situation, discussing options, and defining the way forward:
- Topic: Start by identifying the focus of the conversation. Ask, โWhat would you like to discuss today?โ
- Goal: Set a clear objective for the session. โWhat do you want to achieve by the end of our conversation?โ
- Reality: Explore the current situation. โWhat is happening now? What have you tried so far?โ
- Options: Brainstorm possible solutions. โWhat could you do? What are your options?โ
Way Forward: Agree on actionable steps. โWhat will you do next? How will you move forward?โ
To learn how to use the T-GROW model in depth, check out our blog.ย
The Mentoring Funnel – Framework 3
Start broadly with check-ins and trust-building, then narrow down to specific issues, self-awareness, possibilities, and action planning. Here is a summary of the steps!
- Check-In: Begin with a general discussion to build rapport and trust.
- Focus: Narrow down to specific topics the mentee wants to address.
- Self-Awareness: Encourage mentees to reflect on their thoughts and feelings about the issue.
- Possibilities: Explore potential solutions and strategies.
- Action Planning: Develop a concrete plan for the mentee to implement.
Step 1: General Check-In
The check-in phase sets the tone for the mentoring session. Itโs an opportunity to establish rapport, build trust, and create a comfortable environment for open communication. Hereโs how you can begin the session!
Open-Ended Questions: Begin with broad, open-ended questions that invite the mentee to share their current state.
For example, โHow have you been since our last meeting?โ or โWhatโs been on your mind lately?โ
Active Listening: Practice active listening by giving your full attention to the mentee, making eye contact, and nodding to show understanding. Avoid interrupting and allow them to express their thoughts fully.
Empathy and Validation: Show empathy and validate their experiences. Acknowledge their feelings and provide reassurance.
Statements like โThat sounds challengingโ or โI can understand why you feel that wayโ can help build trust.
Summarise and Reflect: Summarise what the mentee has shared and reflect back to ensure understanding.
This demonstrates that you are engaged and helps clarify their thoughts. For example, โSo, it sounds like youโve been dealing with xyz, is that correct?โ
Step 2: Narrowing Focus
Once the general check-in is complete, itโs time to narrow the focus to specific topics or issues the mentee wants to address. This helps create a more structured and productive conversation.
Hereโs how to approach this step:
Identify Main Concerns: Ask the mentee to identify the main concerns or goals they want to discuss.
Questions like โWhat would you like to focus on today?โ or โWhatโs the most pressing issue youโre facing?โ can help narrow the focus.
Prioritise Issues: If the mentee has multiple concerns, help them prioritize which ones to address first. Use techniques like ranking or rating to determine the most important topics.
For example, โOn a scale of 1 to 10, how important is this issue to you?โ
Set Clear Objectives: Work with the mentee to set clear objectives for the session. Define what they hope to achieve by the end of the conversation. This helps ensure that the discussion remains focused and goal-oriented.
Step 3: Building Self-Awareness
In this step, the focus is on helping the mentee build self-awareness by reflecting on their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors related to the issue. This deeper understanding can lead to more effective problem-solving. Hereโs how to facilitate this process:
Reflective Questions: Ask reflective questions that encourage the mentee to explore their thoughts and feelings. For example, โHow do you feel about this situation?โ or โWhat thoughts come to mind when you think about this issue?โ
Identify Patterns: Help the mentee identify patterns or recurring themes in their experiences. This can reveal underlying beliefs or behaviors that may be influencing the situation. For example, โHave you noticed any patterns in how you respond to similar situations?โ
Explore Motivations: Discuss the menteeโs motivations and goals related to the issue. Understanding why they want to address the issue can provide valuable insights. For example, โWhatโs motivating you to make this change?โ or โWhat do you hope to achieve by resolving this issue?โ
Step 4: Exploring Possibilities
With a deeper understanding of the issue, itโs time to explore potential solutions and strategies. This step encourages creative thinking and considers various perspectives.
Hereโs how to guide this exploration:
Brainstorm Solutions: Encourage the mentee to brainstorm a wide range of possible solutions. Use techniques like mind mapping or free association to generate ideas. Avoid judgment and create a safe space for all suggestions.
Consider Pros and Cons: Evaluate the potential pros and cons of each solution. Discuss the potential outcomes and implications of each option. This helps the mentee make informed decisions.
Encourage Creativity: Encourage the mentee to think creatively and consider unconventional solutions. Ask questions like โWhatโs a completely different approach you could take?โ or โHow might you think outside the box?โ
Step 5: Developing Action Plans
The final step is to develop a concrete action plan that outlines the steps the mentee will take to implement the chosen solution.
This plan should be specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound (SMART). Hereโs how to create an effective action plan:
Define Specific Steps: Break down the chosen solution into specific, actionable steps. Ensure that each step is clear and manageable. For example, โThe first step is to schedule a meeting with your supervisor to discuss your concerns.โ
Set Deadlines: Establish realistic deadlines for each step. This helps create a sense of urgency and accountability. For example, โLetโs set a deadline for scheduling the meeting by the end of this week.โ
Identify Resources: Identify any resources or support the mentee may need to complete the action plan. This could include additional training, access to tools, or seeking advice from others.
For example, โDo you need any specific resources to prepare for the meeting?โ
Monitor Progress: Plan regular check-ins to monitor progress and provide ongoing support. This helps ensure that the mentee stays on track and can address any challenges that arise.
For example, โLetโs schedule a follow-up meeting in two weeks to review your progress.โ
The Role of Advice in Mentoring
While mentoring often involves sharing more of our experiences and ideas, itโs important to offer advice carefully. Rather than giving direct advice, frame it as a suggestion or an option for the mentee to consider. This maintains their autonomy and encourages them to explore and decide what works best for them.
The Gift of Mentoring
Mentoring is a powerful gift we can offer others. Whether volunteering to mentor students, supporting underrepresented individuals in organizations, or simply sharing our experiences, mentoring enriches both the mentor and the mentee. It fosters growth, learning, and mutual benefit.
To Sum up…
Mentoring is a dynamic and fulfilling process that requires clarity, trust, and adaptability. By balancing various roles, setting clear expectations, and using practical tools, we can create impactful mentoring relationships. Embrace the opportunity to mentor and make a difference in someoneโs professional journey.
ย Here are more resources you can discover:
About the Author
Jean Balfour is Managing Director of Bailey Balfour and Programme Director of our ICF Accredited Coach Training Programmes. Jean is passionate about helping people to have good conversations both at work and at home. She believes that coaching is a life skill and that you never regret learning to coach.